.Editor's Keep in mind: The following is the text message of a letter from Expedition 3 Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Leader, USN Retired), reflecting on the celebrations of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't composed very much regarding specifics of this mission throughout the month I have actually been actually listed below, mostly for 2 explanations: the very first being actually that there has actually been really little bit of time to perform that sort of writing, and also second of all considering that I am actually uncertain how pleasant I am discussing thought and feelings I share with friends and family with the rest of the globe.Well, undoubtedly the globe modified today. What I point out or even do is really slight compared to the importance of what occurred to our nation today when it was assaulted by ... by whom? Terrorists is all we know, I guess. Hard to recognize at whom to route our temper and anxiety ...I had actually just completed a variety of tasks this morning, the best taxing being actually the physical exams of all workers participants. In a personal talk observing that, the tour plastic surgeon told me they were having a very poor time on the ground. I had no idea ...He defined the situation to me as absolute best he knew it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was amazed, at that point alarmed. My 1st thought was that this wasn't a genuine discussion, that I was actually still listening closely to among my Tom Clancy strips. It merely didn't seem to be feasible on this incrustation in our country. I couldn't also visualize the particulars, also prior to the updates of further devastation began being available in.Vladimir visited fairly quickly, sensing that one thing quite serious was being gone over. I swung Michael into the component at the same time. They were also astounded and also stunned. After our company authorized off, I made an effort to explain to Vladimir as well as Michael as absolute best I might the possible size of this particular act of terror in midtown New york and at the Government. They accurately recognized and also were really sympathetic.I eyed the World Map on the computer system to view where over the world we were as well as saw that our company were happening southeast away from Canada and would certainly be skipping New England in a couple of mins. I zipped around the terminal till I located a home window that would offer me a scenery of New York City and grabbed the closest camera. It occurred to be a video camera, as well as I was actually looking southern coming from the home window of Michael's log cabin.The smoke cigarettes seemed to have an odd blossom to it at the base of the pillar that was streaming south of the area. After checking out among the newspaper article our experts only acquired, I think our experts were actually looking at NY around the time of, or quickly after, the collapse of the 2nd high rise. Exactly how dreadful ...I swung the electronic camera all along the East Coastline to the south to find if I could observe some other smoke cigarettes around Washington, or even anywhere else, but absolutely nothing was visible.It was actually rather difficult to deal with work afterwards, though we had some to perform, but on the following track we moved across the US more southern. All three people were working 1 or 2 cameras to try to acquire perspectives of New york city or even Washington. There was actually haze over Washington, but no particular source might be seen. It all looked incredible from a couple of hundred miles away. I can not imagine the awful settings on the ground.Besides the emotional impact of our country being actually tackled as well as 1000s of our citizens and also perhaps some buddies being actually killed, one of the most mind-boggling feeling being where I am is among solitude.Following time ... I think the fatigue as well as emotional pressure acquired the greatest of me. I could not remain awake as well as continue to create. Today was still complicated, however we started acquiring even more details, plus we had the respect of talking straight along with the Facility Supervisor, Roy Estess, that ensured our team that the ground staffs will continue to operate and also guarantee our safety, in addition to the secure operation of the Place. Our experts likewise heard from our Supervisor, Mr. Goldin, who incorporated that the companions in the Plan are actually all absolutely committed to proceeding safe functions and help. These were certainly never inquiries for me. I recognize all these people! The ground staffs have actually been surprisingly helpful, quite understanding of the effect of the updates, as well as have actually tried to be as helpful as possible. They have actually all been actually really expert and also centered though I can't envision the diversion of this form of updates can be found in and the notion that authorities structures could be vulnerable. They never bypassed a beat, also when moving control centers. As well as a team of elderly employees and also pals provided us a fairly thorough briefing about what was known and also what was actually being actually performed in the federal government and at NASA on Tuesday mid-day, which was quite beneficial and also type of them to do in the middle of all the chaos. The Russian TsUP has likewise been supportive as well as practical, attempting to uplink news articles when our very own resources were inoperable, and also claiming kind terms ...My crewmates have actually been wonderful, also. They recognize it's been actually a challenging day for me and the individuals on the ground, and also they have actually attempted to be as even keeled and helpful as possible. Michael also repaired me my preferred Borscht soup for supper. As well as they offer me plenty of area to presume when I needed it. They are actually incredibly understanding and also certainly shocked at whoever would do this.I know plenty of folks in Washington, so many individuals that journey to DC as well as NYC, numerous who are flies, that I experienced certain I would certainly obtain at least a couple of parts of bad news over the following couple of days. I acquired the very first one today when I learned that the Captain of the American Airlines jet that reached the Government was actually Chic Burlingame, a schoolmate of mine. I found Chic during the course of cadet summer when we resided in the D&B together, and also our team had lots of classes with each other. I can not envision what he needs to of experienced, and also currently I listen to that he may possess risen even more than we can also think about by possibly preventing his aircraft from being the one to attack the White Residence. What a horrendous loss, but I'm sure Chic was actually battling bravely to the end. And also tears don't stream the same in space ...It's hard to illustrate exactly how it experiences to be the only American totally off the world at once like this. The sensation that I should be there along with all of you, taking care of this, aiding in some way, is actually difficult. I understand that our team are on the limit (or past) of a dreadful shift in the past of the planet. Numerous traits will never ever be the same once more after September 11, 2001. Certainly not just for the thousands and also countless people directly affected by these horrendous acts of terrorism, however most likely for all of us. Our company will discover our own selves experiencing in a different way regarding lots of traits, consisting of perhaps area expedition, unfortunately.It's unpleasant to view smoke pouring coming from wounds in your personal nation coming from such an excellent angle. The duality of getting on a space probe devoted to enhancing everyday life on the earth as well as watching lifestyle being ruined by such willful, horrendous actions is actually jolting to the psyche, no matter who you are. And also the understanding that everything will certainly be actually different than when our team introduced due to the time we land is a little bit of disconcerting. I have confidence in our nation as well as in our leadership that our experts will certainly do everything feasible to much better defend her as well as our family members, and also to carry fair treatment wherefore has been actually done. I have peace of mind that the really good individuals at NASA will definitely perform everything needed to proceed our mission properly and return our company safely at the right time. And also I overlook every one of you very much. I can not be there along with you face to face, as well as our experts possess a very long way to head to accomplish our purpose, however be actually certain that my soul is with you, as well as recognize you are in my prayers.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An update to the last letter ... Fortunately, it is actually been a hectic week up right here. As well as to show that, like our country, our experts are actually continuing on our designated pathway along with organization as usual (as high as feasible). Tonight the most recent addition to the place, the Russian Docking Area will definitely be actually released from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Sunday evening (United States time), it will definitely dock with our team, at a port never ever used before on the nadir side of the Service Module. This new module will definitely provide our company one more spot to dock a Progress or Soyuz and also will certainly supply a huge airlock with two useable hatches for carrying out EVA's in Russian Orlan fits, which we will certainly do a few of before we come home.The trouble just before in taking care of recently was actually too little news. The problem today is actually excessive. It arrived simultaneously when e-mail was actually brought back, and also there's not enough time to review all of it! Plus it's as well challenging to handle all of it simultaneously. Yet I enjoy acquiring it, as well as I actually enjoy the fantastic characters of help as well as companionship I am receiving.Our team are succeeding on board, acquiring our job performed, and discussing points. Last evening our company possessed a lengthy conversation over dinner regarding the importance of these celebrations, the possible activities to follow, and what should be carried out. After dinner, Michael resolved informing me that every email he acquired coming from close friends in Russia claimed especially to tell me just how regretful they were actually that this occurred, extending their condolences, and talking to exactly how I was actually carrying out. Vladimir taught me the Russian word for "condolences" after talking with the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Superstar City. (Both the Russian as well as the English words are actually considerably very long to verbalize easily.) Very type folks.For the last pair of times, the Russian MCC has actually been good enough to transmit real-time shows of broadcast news concerning the event and also affiliated tales, to make certain I was actually properly informed. Every professional who has actually come on free throw line to discuss a method or even a trouble has at some factor extended introductions to me along with kind words. Tonight the Russian capcom told our team that due to the wedding day of recognition in the United States, all day folks had actually been actually carrying blooms and also edging all the walls of the US consulate in Moscow, and this night they were lighting candles in the street outside the consular office. Exactly how the globe has changed.People almost everywhere seem to be to recognize the senselessness and scary in this assault. And also the remarkable reduction. Moscow has handled these type of complications in the last few years with house and also subway battles, so they are as restless to do away with this threat as our experts are actually. But all-time low collection is actually that there are really good individuals almost everywhere that want to live in peace. I check out that a kid asked, "The United States is actually so excellent to other countries, our experts always help every person, how can they detest our company so much?".I really hope the example of participation as well as trust that this spacecraft plus all people in the plan show daily will at some point motivate the rest of the planet to function similarly. They must!Unfortunately, our team will not be actually piloting over the US during the time people are lighting candle lights. Do not understand if we could possibly view that anyhow. Our company carried out, having said that, observe a very unusual and also gorgeous view a couple of minutes ago: the launch of our Docking Area on a Soyuz booster. We were overtaking it and also it emerged about three minutes after its own launch coming from Baikonur as the sunlight hit our station, so it was actually still in the dark. It resembled a large comet with a straight, wide rear silhouetted against the darker world beneath. Regardless of some negative illumination for a while as the sunshine struck our home window at a low viewpoint, I dealt with some video of it as initially our team passed the rocket, and then saw it start to mesmerize as it obtained altitude and speed. I filmed up until primary engine cutoff as well as booster separation took place just as our experts came close to sunup on the Mountain ranges. A memorable view in an extraordinary full week ...Lifestyle takes place, also precede. Our company're below to keep ... Frank.